I am, by nature, an introvert. An extreme INFP. Every time. It is the day after Christmas and I am overwhelmed.
I think it is too much of everything. Not the food and drink kind of everything but the stimulation and the newness of so many things in the last few weeks. Like the main character in my WIP I don’t do change well. I’m not talking about just big change like moving or changing jobs but even little changes like the icons on my desktop not being in the same place because Windows has decided to rearrange them for me without warning.
It is all the little things that have piled up to make me feel overwhelmed.
In the last week and a half I bought new glasses, a new camera and a new monitor. This is all good, I know. But it is hard for me.
The monitor went back (it was too big and it hurt my eyes) and I inheirted my husband’s old monitor and have had to deal with the fact that every time I plug the laptop into the monitor all the icons move. I also have a new keyboard tray, articulating, which is good, but it is different and I can’t get the monitor height right. In order to plug the monitor into the laptop I have to put the laptop on the opposite side of my desk than I used to. No big deal but something else to get used to.
I don’t have the new glasses yet – I pick them up tomorrow – but there will be much getting used to with them as they are not only different in style but are progressives as well.
The new camera is so different and the only thing I like better about it is the size. My husband likes it enough for us to keep it but when I look at it just bugs me for no reason. Or for stupid reasons because I can’t stand the adapter that plugs into the bottom of it so it can connect to the computer. It’s a dumb reason to not like something.
And now I have an iPod which I have avoided for a while because, okay, I am really weird on this, but having music pumped right into my ears is just too intense for me. It is too too much. I am hoping I will get used to it or figure something out. But then it also means getting used to a different interface with iTunes. Argh.
I need a new cell phone because my old one is held together with tape but the thought of picking out a new one is again, too too much.
I find that right now my brain is exhausted from people and movies and music and so much more.
How do the rest of you do it? How do you cope with so much newness in your life and the constant influx of stimulation?
When my kids were little and one of them would get hurt, like the time my son split his head open with an aluminum baseball bat, I was totally calm in the middle of the crisis. It was only later, after I had him safe at home again, tucked into his own little bed, then I would let myself fall apart.
That’s what I feel like now. And I feel so absolutely silly that I feel that way. Sigh.